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women

Eleven people were hanging on rope of a helicopter

were ten men and one woman.

Since the rope was not strong enough to support all eleven people, they decided that one had let fall on deaf ears should have otherwise die out.
They could not agree on who should make the gesture until the woman gave a touching speech saying she would be to voluntarily leave the rope because the women are used to give up everything for their children
and their men, all men give without receiving anything in return ...

Just finished speaking, all people began to clap ...

Never underestimate the power a woman ...




One day, three friends went for a walk and suddenly found themselves
front of a big raging torrent.

absolutely had to get across
but had no idea how to cross it.

One of the three then began to pray:

- Please, my God, give me strength to cross the river!

PUF! God gave him two strong arms and two legs
so powerful that he was able to cross the river to swim in two hours, but
twice came close to drowning.

Seeing this, the second friend also prayed to his After asking God:

- Please, Lord, give me strength ...
and means to cross the river!

PUF! God gave him a boat and rowing
which could cross the river in an hour, but twice came close to capsizing.

The third partner, strong experience of the other two,
decided to turn to God :

- Please, God, give me strength, means ...
and intelligence to cross the river!

PUF! God it turned into a woman.
you check the map, walked about 200 meters upstream and crossed the bridge
.







A man is driving along a winding, narrow mountain road. A woman driving along the same path but in reverse.

When you meet, the woman opened the car window and shouts: Maialeee!

The man, immediately opened his window and yells, Bitch! Each of them continued on their way, and soon the man
hairpin turns later,
collides with a big pig in the middle of the road.

If only men were to listen ...







A couple went on vacation on a lake where you could go fishing. He

liked to fish at dawn and she loved reading.

One morning he came back after several hours of fishing
and decided to lie down for a nap.

Although the lake was not the family, she decided to go sailing.

rowed a bit ', anchored the boat and began to read his book. After a while, 'a guard appeared in his boat.

He called the woman and said

- Good morning, ma'am ... What are you doing?

- Leggo! - She replied, thinking it was obvious.

- Located in an area of \u200b\u200bprohibition of fishing !

- But I'm not fishing! Can not you see?

- Yes, but with it has everything you need.
will have to follow and I will fine!

- If it does, the complaint for rape!
the woman said indignantly.

- Ma .. but if I have not even touched!

- Yes .. But with it has everything you need ...

Never discuss with women who can read.







What is the difference between men and women?

A woman wants one man
meet all its needs, while
a man wants every woman
meet the unique needs they have.





should send this message to 5 smart and funny women you know to make them laugh!

You may also send this message to 5 people smart enough to find it funny sense of humor!

... OK, 5 smart women can be found easily

... ... but what about the 5 men?

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Beauty Contest ...

And who has won .....

HIM won the Miss Transvestite Contest in Thailand.

are all Men! ...

(I'm sure or that you'll watch again the pictures!)

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DID YOU KNOW .....

a lot of strange things ....! (recommended reading for people extremely stressed)

DID YOU KNOW .....

• it is impossible to suck your elbow.
• that Coca Cola was originally green.
• What you can do to a cow upstairs but not farglielescendere.
• that payment of a duck (Quach, Quach) does not echo and nobody knows why.
• What a crocodile can not stick out their tongue.
• that the pigs can not physically look at the sky.
• What if you try to hold back a sneeze, may cause breaking ofa vein in the brain or neck, and you may die.
• That lighter was invented before matches.
• Let every king of cards represents a great king in history:

Pi That Shakes: King David.

Flowers: Alexander the Great.

Hearts: Charlemagne.

Paintings: GiulioCesare.

What
• multiplying 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 you get 12,345,678,987,654,321. What
• in an equestrian statue, if the horse has two legs in the air, the person on his back died in combat, if the horse has unadelle forelegs raised, the person died as a result of a wound inflicted in combat, if the horse has all four legs on the ground, lapersona died of natural causes.
• That name comes from the abbreviation used Jeep americanoauto army for 'general purpose' ie GP delivered in English.
• That's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. What
• righties live on average nine years of left-handers.
• What the cockroach can live nine days without its head, first home ... of hunger.
• that elephants are the only animals that do not create possonosaltare (thankfully).
• that an average person laughs about 15 times a day.
• That word comes from the cemetery greek koimetirion which means dormitory.
• in ancient England people could not have sex without the consent of the King (unless you were a member of the royal family). When people wanted a child had to ask permission from the King, who delivered a plate that had to hang out portamentre had rapporti.La Fornication Under Consent of plaque said the King (FUCK.). This is the origin of the word.
• That during the Civil War, when troops returned without any dropped to loroquartieri, wrote on a large blackboard 0Killed (zero deaths). Here comes the expression OK to say all is well.
• that when the English conquerors arrived in Australia , were terrified to see the strange animals that were saltiincredibili. Immediately call a local (indigenous Australians were extremely peaceful) and tried to ask questions with gestures. Feeling that the native always said Kan Ru Ghu adopted the English word kangaroo (kangaroo). Linguists after research determined that the meaning of what the Indians wanted to say was I do not understand.
• that 80% of people who read this book have tried sucking my elbow !!!!!

COUNCIL:
When you break your work, and you're on the brink of depression, and nothing goes as you plan, do the following: leaving the office, stopped at a pharmacy buying a rectal thermometer Johnson and Johnson '(only this brand).

Open it and read the instructions.

found this sentence somewhere:

"Every rectal thermometer 'Johnson and Johnson' has been personally tested in our factory."

Now close your eyes and repeat out loud five times: 'I'm happy not to work in the department of quality control by Johnson and Johnson'!!!!

Laugh And NOW!
Come on, recommend this blog to your friends, they are dying, and always remember that we are worse than your work!

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Lynsay Dawn Mckennzie

'PUPPY DISAPPEARED'

Please forward this mail, please ....
One lady lost her dog ... help us find him ..... And 'desperate! THE CENTRE Gira
to reward leaflets attacking everywhere.
I send a photo.
Thanks!

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coffee at 62 € a rare cup of coffee a shit

ANSA) - London, 10 APR - In London you can 'enjoy a rare type of coffee', obtained with seeds collected in the droppings of a cat coffee 'feeds. And 'the latest news' offered by a department store in London, the price of 50 pounds (62 euro) to the cup. The mixture is called Caffe 'rare and has' created by mixing Jamaican Blue Mountain to Kopi Luwak. Only the latter is first eaten by Musang, a cat that chooses the best beans Asia, and then deposited in the form of excrement.

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A small help to know a bit 'better .. (But just a little ')

KEY WORDS

9 words that women use :

1) NOTE: this is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) 5 Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means half an hour. 5 minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 minutes to watch the game before helping to do something.

3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. It means something ... and you should be alert. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4) go ahead: it is a challenge, not a permit. Do not ever do it.

5) Loud Sigh: This is as a word, but a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time there before you to discuss anything (back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6) OK: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. It means that he needs to think long and hard before deciding how and when to make you pay.

7) THANKS: A woman is thanking you, do not question or faint, just want to thank you (I would add in a clause here - is true unless she says "thank you" that is PURE sarcasm and is not thanking you. DO NOT REPLY not that's because it would lead to a "what you want."

8) WHAT YOU WANT: the woman is the way to say go do *** o.

9) I DO NOT worry about it: Another dangerous statement, meaning that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

Send it to everyone you know to warn them that the discussions could avoid if only they remember the terminology.
Send it to all the women you know to make them laugh because they know it's true.